Five Things for a Friday. (Sunday version!)

1. On Wednesday night Lee and I went to the launch of a restaurant he made some tables and stools for. It was packed and the furniture looked awesome. He is one clever cookie, that guy. Because we were out in the city SANS CHILD, we made the most of it and had some alcoholic beverages, and I wore heels like a proper grown-up. SUCH FRIVOLITY! We kind of thought that the party would include food, but besides a single tiny wagyu croquette and some weird crumbed bone marrow thing that was eaten straight off the femur (eww), there was nada. We hobbled next door to ChinChin to eat and were told the wait was over an hour. Screw that mofo! So we got the hell out of dodge and went to Brother Burger on Brunswick St. OH MY LORD you guys it was amazing. And obviously we had to get Trampoline icecream after. Date night ended with us sitting in the car eating sundaes listening to Smooth FM. Good times.

2. Archie had his 12 month injections on Wednesday morning. He was a brave little soldier. Barely flinched for the first one, then winced a bit for the second. As the lady got the third jab ready he clocked on to what was happening and did epic sad face, but straight after the injection the nurse pulled out a bubble wand and he forgot his woes because BUBBLES! He blew kisses at her as we left. Such a charmer, that kid.

3. On Tuesday morning I spent the morning working and Archie was looked after by my grandma. He was fine! I was slightly worried, not because I didn't think she could look after him, but he has been a bit clingy lately and I thought he would have an epic meltdown when he realised I was gone. But no dramas at all! He is totally fine being looked after by someone else. So obviously now this means I am going to go on a solo holiday to Bali for a week. Or something.

4. This is probably justifies a post all on it's own, but it is funny how many things I do now that I swore I would never do when I was a self-righteous pregnant lady who had never really spent time with a baby before. My golden child would never watch TV or know what a smartphone was, or eat anything not lovingly prepared in my kitchen from organic wholefoods. Yesterday, he was watching Play School whilst sucking on a food pouch and playing with my phone, so I could fold washing. My, how my opinion has changed.

5. On Friday night I saw Kate Miller-Heidke perform at St Michael's Church on Collins St. I went with two lovely ladies I used to work with and had dinner before at the Waiter's Restaurant. The whole night was gorgeous. I don't know much of Kate's newer music but she sang some old stuff too and chatted lots in between songs which I LOVE. What a voice.

Five Things for a Friday. (Saturday Edition!)

I wrote this on Friday, but was too tired to finish it. So here's Five Things, the Saturday Edition!

1.We had Archie's first birthday party last weekend. It was pretty freaking awesome. He got sufficiently spoilt and had a ball. Although I'm pretty sure he was more excited about the balloons than anything else. That kid sure does love balloons.

Also, I realised that my high-falutin' cake ideas were waaaay out of my league. Apparently becoming a mother does not automatically allow one to create amazeballs birthday cakes if one has never made said cakes before. My planned awesome cake of awesomeness failed miserably so I had to re-make the same cake I made for playgroup.

2. In other news,  Archer has started walking! Very wobbily and stiff-legged, like a drunken cowboy, but definitely taking steps on his own. A whole new adventure awaits us now. Like most milestones, I am partially excited about it but am also missing the days when he just stayed still and was happy to roll around and garble to himself contentedly. Now he is Mr Personality, and will waddle over to snuggle up then smack me in the face, poke a finger in my eye and growl like a lion. More independence is a beautiful thing, but he is now a toddler, not a wee baby anymore. Sob!

3. Living in Warrandyte means we have access to a river with lots of ducks. Big, noisy, quacking ducks that are obviously used to being fed. So much so that they come right up to the pram at baby head height and QUACK! Archie was so excited that he was literally shaking all over and huffing and quacking and waving his arms, not unlike a duck. I foresee plenty more duck feeding time in our future.

4. We discovered that there is an current planning permit for a two storey dwelling on our new property. HELLO! For anyone unfamiliar with the town planning process regarding renovating houses (which is most of you (except my dad. Hi, dad!)), this is potential GOLD. Hopefully, we can just amend the existing planning permit with our new design and re-submit the permit. Then we need a demolishing permit and a building permit and oh god that's enough.

Meanwhile, Lee and I are doing our first official day's work on our new house tomorrow. To say we are excited is an understatement. Who even are we any more? I never thought I would be looking forward to a day spent in a cold, stinky house, pulling up carpet that is probably rife with STDs and bong water, and yanking down old cobwebby plasterboard. Oh, but I am excited!

5. My current attitude towards the news and mainstream media and politics is to make like this (a big deal to a former political journalist) but trickles of the news have gotten through to me this week and GOOD LORD I have so much rage about the way the PM is being treated. This and this and this and this. It is beyond embarrassing. I am not her biggest fan, but I am even less of a fan of her opposition leader. And irrespective of what anybody thinks of the Prime Minister herself, at the very least respect her position. The whole political Australian fair-go, tall-poppy-slashing, larrikin, matey thing had transgressed into a cesspit of disrespect and snivelling and snark and teenage-boy immaturity. Grow up.

Herding cats

I am writing this in my parent's study in my childhood home in Warrandyte. It is actually really good living here (I'm not sure why I am surprised). I get help with looking after Archie, Lee is closer to work, it is a bigger, warmer, cleaner house and mum and dad eat like freaking rabbits so Lee and I will probably lose like 15 kilos each.

We finally moved all our crap here. Except for Dave and Layla. They are being cheeky little mofos and refused to get in the cat cage, or even come within ten feet of me yesterday. So I have to go back today and lure them inside, then wrestle them into the cages. Awesome.

Mum has been looking after Archie a lot for the past few days while I was packing/unpacking/cleaning/herding pain in the ass cats and God I missed him. He has pretty much stopped breastfeeding during the day and only feeds before bed and occasionally during the night. I will write about all this one day soon. The whole ending-breastfeeding thing is so tricky and rife with mixed-up feelings.

Archie turns one on Friday. I have SO MANY FEELINGS about it all. We are having a little party on Saturday and I have begun preparing the cake extravaganza. Oh yes. Thursday is dedicated to cake-fest, Friday is his playgroup party with Cake #1 and then Friday afternoon is preparing for Cake #2.

Five Things for a Friday.

1. We are moving house tomorrow. God, I hate it. I just want to be done. I have packed pretty much everything except for our clothes and big furniture, so tomorrow we just have to pack the whitegoods, couch, beds and chairs and a million boxes into the ute and trailer, take it out to mum and dads and then fill their back room with all our crap. I have tried to be a tad more organised this time around and label all the boxes properly, unlike the last time we moved when I got sick of organising and threw stuff randomly into boxes, so the toaster was packed with some underwear, nailpolish, a doona cover and some books. Which made it really fun to unpack.

2. And we settled on the new house yesterday! It's all ours, baby. First order is to change the locks, because god knows who has a key, and um, it's not the most secure house anyway. Then we can start the real work.

3. Archie's 1st birthday is in ONE WEEK. We are just having a little family party, but I have very grand plans for the cakes(s). I don't want to give too much away, but let's just say specialty baking equipment has been procured.

I am feeling all nostalgic about his birthday too. So much has changed. This time last year, I was extremely pregnant and was sick of it. I just went back and read some of the posts I wrote back then, and I can hardly recognise the person I was. What did I do with all my spare time? And my clean house? Probably just sauntered around with my teeny handbag, getting in and out of the car with ease. Being self-centred and drinking wine and flexing my pelvic floor muscles. I used to moan about having to get up at 7.30am to go to work! SEVEN-THIRTY! That would be a gigantic sleep in these days.

4. Last weekend we bummed around all day on Sunday, then went to the pool. The pool is AWESOME. And Archie goes nuts for it. And it was totally not as much work and effort as I always think. I'm looking forward to our new house being a five minute walk to the Brunswick Baths.

5. Last night I finally managed to go to yoga after having to miss it for the past couple of weeks. It was rainy and freezing but I'm glad I went, because I was THE ONLY ONE THERE. As in, it was just me and the teacher. I thought it would be super awkward but it wasn't. It was like a personal yoga session because we just did the stuff I wanted to do. I hope I can find another yoga class when we move to Warrandyte too because, man, I love it.

Readings of late.

I read a lot of stuff, online, offline, in books, in newspapers, in magazines, on the back of noodle packets and on bathroom walls. Here are some interesting things that have caught my fancy lately... My So-Called 'Post-Feminist' Life in Arts and Letters in The Nation. This article blew me away. It is easy to think that the creative industries - writing, making, art, etc- are free from institutionalised sexism, but.... no.

A bullshit-free discussion about the realities of how early parenthood affects your relationship(s) on A Practical Wedding.

I'm not a huge fan of Russel Brand and don't really know much about him, but someone tweeted this piece that he wrote about the horrorific attack in Woolwich and it hits the nail on the head for me.

Need a Job? Invent It in the NYT. "We need to focus more on teaching the skill and will to learn and to make a difference and bring the three most powerful ingredients of intrinsic motivation into the classroom: play, passion and purpose.”

Paul Miller was a technology writer and total webophile before going offline for year. He expected to become enlightened and calmer...but didn't.

Art for Archie.

For the little guy's first birthday, we didn't want to get him more toys or clothes or books or STUFF.  He already has a lot of toys and clothes and blocks and books and cute outfits and sheets and stuffed toys and random plastic things and trucks and instruments. So we decided to get him some art. Nothing too fancy, just something that will hang on his wall from now until he moves out at the age of 35, into a granny flat in the backyard because I, ah, have detachment issues. We don't have tons of cash at the moment (hi there, two mortgages!) so I don't want to spend a million buks either. Anyway, I have been scouting my fave local artists and illustrators and nothing eye-popping has jumped out at me, so I checked out the awesome site Signed and Delivered, which sells arts by local artists at relatively affordable prices.

These are on the shortlist:

That Was Radio Clash by Boo

You're the Anchor by Kelly AllenBefriend Your Blues by Eddy Sara

I also love this Ghostpatrol print:

And this one by Matte Stephens at Outre:

Five Things for a Friday

Kissing the TV. Always with the kissing. This guy!

1. Archie got his finger stuck in the hole in his Very Hungry Caterpillar book this morning. It was jammed right in the middle of a plum, and his fingertip was slowly turning purple (like , um, a plum) so I had to tear the book a bit to get his finger out. It was very dramatic.

2. Allegedly, the other night in my sleep I grabbed Lee's head with both hands, shouted, "Daddy!!" then rolled over and kept sleeping. Awkward.

3. I bought this Sally Hansen nail stuff that turns any polish into quick-dry. It has changed my life. I love having coloured nails but dom't have the time to sit and wait for them to dry. This stuff has revolutionised my motley but vast collection of cheap nail polishes.

4. I am still reading Warren Buffet's biography. It is a bloody big book. Part of me wants to give up on it because it is not aesthetically pleasing on my bedside table. I have , like, house vanity. Don't wear make up or brush my hair, but dear god I have to have a good-looking bedside table vignette.

The before shot. There is no after shot because... they are delicious..

5. I woke up in a foul mood this morning. My back was killing me because Dave (the cat, not my live-in lover) pinned me down all night and I was too zonked to move, but awake enough to be annoyed and occasionally flap my arms at Dave. And the house is ridiculously messy because we are half-packed and there is crap everywhere and I want to move to a cave in the forest. So obviously, I made cinnamon scrolls.

And an added extra: 6. I am in LOVE with this new (to me) blog Dos Family. They are two Swedish chicks who live in opposite sides of Sweden, and have two kids each and AMAZINGLY colourful over-the-top houses which look real and messy and cluttered. They write about crafty things and DIYs and design and kids and food and everything, and are WINNING at the internet. It totally makes me love my over-decorated colourful house with ten million crocheted blankets and fluoro art and cats and vegies even more. I am all in favour of more FUN in a house.

Exhibits A,B,C and D:

Glamping

Off-road pramming!

The master fisherwoman showing the vegetarian how it is done.

Mesmerising. Note the handy in-fire saucepan shelf.

Meatfest for breakfast.

Tellytubby!

Dad and Ben.

On the weekend we went camping to my grandpa's shack in Enoch's Point, near Eildon. It is a bit more glamourous than your regular camping (proper beds, fireplace, hot water) but not quite a five star hotel (need a four-wheel-drive to get there, toilet is over a mineshaft, FREEZING COLD). It was perfect for our first semi-camping experience with Archie. My parents and my brother ended up coming too, which made it a lot easier for us.

There was lots of fishing (Dad caught a giant trout on his fifth cast and was extremely smug all weekend), walking, baby-chasing, eating, and fire-poking. Arch had a ball. I think we will spend many more happy times up there, especially when he is a bit bigger and not as likely to try and eat every blade of grass/muddy boot/hot coal.

The Hotel Project is DONE.

I submitted my final presentation for uni on Tuesday night and now I am DONE. Super duper exciting. The final project was a lot of fun, despite some late nights wrestling with ArchiCAD and Photoshop. The project was a luxury hotel in the middle of Melbourne, with a focus on sustainability. I was inspired by traditional Japanese onsen bathhouses, Turkish hamams, modern Tokyo architecture and waxed timber. For the assignment, we created a full drawing package with a CAD model, complete job folder and presentation boards.

Here are my final presentation boards (ignore the weird sample placeholders - I stuck actual tile samples to the board):

I learned a lot through the course and am glad I did it, but most of my construction knowledge comes from growing up with a builder as a dad, living in building sites for the first few years of my life and obviously from renovating houses myself.

So onward and upward! The next year or so will be interesting career-wise, as I take more control of the business and work on getting the kind of projects that excite me. And I will have my evenings back instead of tucking Archie into bed and immediately scurrying to my laptop to render and design and source and schedule. Changes ahoy!

Mother's Day

Yesterday was Mother's Day. It was my first Mother's Day, so it was kind of a big deal. When I was little, I would go to the Mother's Day stall held in the multipurpose hall at my primary school and get mum a flowery mug stuffed with cheap lollies, or some stinky soap in the shape of tiny blue shells, wrapped in an embroidered hanky. I'm pretty sure I never gave much thought to the meaning behind it. All it meant was that mum got breakfast in bed and a present, then she fed us and cleaned up and loved us just like any other day.

And yesterday? It was kind of the same. Lee made bacon and caramelised walnut pancakes, and I got a card from Archie. It was a lovely morning.  Then came the flurry of snot and tears and nappies and blocks and  tiny spoons and socks like every other day. And I realised that this minutiae is the real mothering stuff. Syringing baby Panadol into a sobbing mouth at 3am with one hand. Huge snotty smiles. Staying close to me in a crowd. Finding six plastic spoons and a wooden cow in my handbag. Googling 'baby stomach rash' during lunch.

I read somewhere that the original meaning of Mother's Day came about when an American suffragette founded a special day for mothers to oppose war. That woman, Anna Jarvis, gave birth to eleven children, but seven died in childhood. Imagine. How could you not be a heap on the floor, broken into a million billion pieces forever. It kills me that there are mothers walking around everyday who are grieving babies who didn't make it, mothers with chronically ill babies in the NICU, mothers who have had nine miscarriages, mothers whose bodies can't bear children, mothers who desperately want a baby but haven't met the right person. This whole womanhood gig is filled with heartache and pain and love. The collective love and pain and anxiety of every other mother who has had a human being pulled or pushed from her body. Breathed in the scent of her baby. Grieved for a baby. Soothed a sobbing child in the middle of the night.

I missed my mum yesterday. She is only in Singapore, and gets back on Wednesday, but I still missed her. And I thought of all the mums who are missing their own mothers on mother's day. Even though my mum was only a phone call away, I felt untethered and frantic and uncomfortable. I hope that Archer can always find my legs in a room to bury his face in, will call me with happy or sad or no news, will feel the sheer brute strength of my love and the collective love of all the mothers in the world. I hope that he can tether himself to me and know that he will always be able to find his way home.

Photos by The Itchy Eyes

Legs eleven.

Dear Archer,

ELEVEN MONTHS. How did we get here?

You have assembled quite the bag of tricks now. Waving (usually after the person has left, but hey, you'll get there), blowing on hot food, standing wobble-legged on your own, doling out sloppy kisses and feeding yourself. You love to clamber up for cuddles and drag over toys or rocks or food to show me, offering them up with sticky hands, a gummy grin and stream of drool.

You are a champion sleeper, my boy. Hopefully that sees you through to adulthood and you don't jolt awake at the tiniest sound or lay wide-eyed in the wee hours next to your wife or husband and yearn for sleep. You go to bed at 7pm on the dot, and we don't usually hear from you until about 5.30am when you dad's alarm wakes up the whole house.

And nice work on the naps too, little man. Your morning sleep is a rock-solid hour and a half or sometimes two hours, and I am an efficiency machine during that time - writing, studying, cleaning, showering, eating, cooking and peeing on my own for the last time until your dad comes home. You usually have another hour or so in the afternoon to get you through the dinner/bath/books/boob/bed routine, then pass out in your cot, sleepy-eyed and floppy.

The epic bread-bun arms are still there, but you have lost the chunky baby fat and are becoming a little boy. Your hair is getting so long that it tickles your ears and you swat madly at it with flailing arms, before sticking a finger in your ear like a crazes archaeologist  And still just three teeth, but those three teeth are big and white and can do damage. You have the appetite of a burly 17-year-old teenager, and love eating sultanas, porridge, Cruskits, broccoli, chicken pieces, apples, yoghurt and blueberries. Yesterday I was feeling virtuous and made a dozen veggie rissoles that I thought would be your lunch for the next week- until you ate six of them in one sitting.

All the food is fuelling your mad race-crawling adventures around the house, thud-clunking with a toy in one hand, pulling yourself up on the couch and snuffling into the cushions in a frenzy of adrenaline. Any time you see something soft on the floor - a pillow, my handbag, a teddy, the cat - you dramatically put your head down to go nigh-nigh, and then crack up laughing. You still get a bit shy around new people, and prefer to stay close to me, but once you warm up will climb up on anyone's lap for a cuddle.

The next update will be your one year. I can't quite believe we survived this long, you and me. But what an adventure it has been.

I love you, little man.

Love,

Mum

Four Things for a Friday

 

1. I have heard about the book Operating Instructions from a few different places now, and really want to read it. I LOVE Anne Lamott's writing and am interested to see hew take on her son's first year. At the moment I am reading Snowball, Warren Buffet's biography. It is huge, like a freaking phonebook, which makes it physically a pain to read (First world problem, much?) but pretty engaging so far.

2. We are trying to eat more fish, so this week I made fish burgers and seared soy and lemon salmon. I also made pumpkin soup, risotto with walnuts, blue cheese and pear, roasted pumpkin and chickpea salad and three loaves of bread. Lee used to do all the cooking, but now that I am home more I have been getting really into meal planning and grocery shopping. I have also started reading lots of foodie blogs - my absolute hands-down favourite is Dinner: A Love Story. I think I'm going to get their cookbook soon.

3. This study in the New York Times made me cry (it doesn't take much...). It found that babies cam down when their mothers pick them up. So true. Archie snuggles in when he gets a fright (he is scared of mum and dad's robotic vacuum cleaner, random loud noises, and occasionally, peekaboo. Like he'll be fine with the first nine 'boos' but will get a huge fright on the tenth. It is SO FUNNY.) I love that they did a preliminary study into whether fathers and grandmothers have the same effect, and it does.

4. I finish uni in two weeks. CANNOT WAIT. Just to have my evenings back to sit on the couch, watch crap TV and eat the icecream that I have bribed Lee to get from the corner shop. And I'll be a fully-qualified interior designer, yo! The business won't know what hit it.

28 Before 28.

So for the past few years, I have made a list around my birthday of stuff that I want to do before my next birthday. I have never ticked off everything on the list - far from it (I'm looking at you, 26 Before 26). Sometimes the stuff carries over to the next year, sometimes it doesn't. Here is last year's list, if you are interested. I didn't do too badly, considering I had a baby two months after I made the list.

Anyway, without further ado, 28 Before 28:

1. Renovate the new house and move in - a work in progress

2. Do at least half of my cross quilt

3. Sort out our super

4. Make icecream in my blender

5. Make a quilt kinda like this one without mum's help

6. Work more in the business and start generating clients

7. Write 100 blog posts

8. Get pregnant again

9. Do the Couch to 5k program - was waylaid by pregnancy!

10. Read the unread books on my bookshelf - this is kind of half done

11. Crochet a beanie for Archie

12. Throw a rad 1st birthday party

13. Eat a durian

14. Make a skirt from my brown skirt pattern

15. Do a session of Bikram yoga

16. Make a photobook of Archie's first year

17. Make a photobook of our wedding

18. Sew a summer dress

19. Make this blog a bit prettier

20. Go to the optometrist

21. Dress Archie up in a Christmas costume (because why have kids if you can't force stupid outfits on them?)

22. Move house (twice) in a calm and orderly fashion

23. Learn to do costing sheets and quotes for work properly

24. Eat less junk

25. Drink more gin and tonics

26. Keep doing awesome meal plans

27. Make homemade Monte Carlos

28. Go to Big River

xx

Waterworks.

So to set the scene, I am sitting here in Ugg boots, leggings, a thermal top, Lee's gigantic old grey hoodie (with the hood up, obviously), a scarf and a dressing gown. HOT. Because it is insanely cold. What the hell, Melbourne? At least ease us in to your frigid winter, instead of going straight from 30+ degrees to THIS.

Anyway, Lee and I watched The Lion King last night. It was the second time he has seen it (I know, I know) and about the 247849th time I had seen it. And yet I still totally lost my mind and burst into tears at the end when Simba and Nala have a baby lion and they hold it up to the sky, all big blinking newborn eyes and curled-up paws. This is an animated cartoon aimed at children, and I knew the tear-jerking scene was coming, but GOD. So many tears. So this brings me to the point of this post, which is that ever since seeing the two lines on the stick I just peed on, I have become ridiculously emotional. I know my mum is reading this and rolling her eyes because I was still quite the cry-baby before getting knocked up, but this is a whole other kettle of fish. When I was pregnant I could blame the emo on hormones, but now I am thinking that it is just the way I am now. SOB.

Things which I have cried at recently:

• I am still yet to read Guess How Much I Love You to Archie without tearing up at the end. Big Nutbrown Hare whispering to a sleeping Little Nutbrown Hair... it gets me every time.
• Some random fact I read on the twits about female elephants forming a circle around an elephant in labour and trumpeting encouragement while she gives birth. Epic waterworks over this one.
• The thought of Archie going to school.
• Boston, Sandy Hook, Aurora, MIT, gang rapes in India, explosions in Texas, murders in Brunswick. I actively avoid the news when there is something horrific happening (which is often). This is a big step for an ex-news journo.
• When Archie had sore teeth and the only thing that soothed him is sitting on the floor cuddling into me, watching ABC Kids while I rubbed his back. Poor little guy.
• The thought of that episode of Love My Way. If you have seen the series, you will know what I am talking about.
• When Archie had a coin in his mouth.
• When my mum left to go overseas for three weeks. THREE WEEKS. What am I, nine years old?

Pass the tissues.

Five Things for a Friday

1. My Mum is leaving today to go to Europe for three weeks for a jaunty cruise with my grandma. I am (not so) secretly freaking out. I talk to her four times a day and rely on her for babysitting and morale support. I think I might have to just grow some balls and man up.

2. Last weekend we went to the Collingwood Children's Farm AGAIN because I love that place. Although this time it was crazy busy because the market was on and there were people everywhere. I had a fab breakfast with some lovely ladies and Archie was a relaxed little dude.

Until... we went to look at the animals and he got bitten by a gigantic rooster that was bigger than him. We have not had a good run with poultry these past few weeks. Little baby fingers must look so much like tiny, delicious worms.

3. There are a few things around these parts that need changing up, mainly my lack of proper income and Lee working a gazillion hours a week. And when you add the whole leasing our house/moving to Mum and Dad's/renovating the brand new money pit thing, plus that tiny human that hangs around me all the time and the possibility of having another tiny human, it was high time for some PLANNING! Lee and I (actually mostly me) love a bit of planning, as it can temporarily convince us that we have our shit sorted. On Wednesday we have a brainstorming session (god this sounds so wanky) and decided that the main things we want to do are to get me involved in the business more and Lee to have some time each week with Archie. So now we have to do some hardcore time management organising shizzle and figure out how the hell we are going to make this happen whilst paying two mortgages and renovating a house. WOOP.

4. On Wednesday morning I woke up with the horrible stay-at-home-mum feeling of "I actually have NO activities on for today." On days when I am home alone with Archer all day, by 3pm I am literally counting down the minutes until Lee gets home so I can pee and shower and hide in the bedroom on my own for TEN FREAKING MINUTES.

So anyway, we decided to go to the playground at Edinburgh Gardens, which was actually freaking awesome. Arch is still a bit young to get the whole playground thing but he went on the slide and crawled around chasing pigeons and eating tan bark. Then we got hungry so walked to Phat Brats on Brunswick Street and GOD it was good. I had a lamb and rosemary sausage on wholemeal bread, topped with coleslaw, mashed peas and crumbled fetta. Most of the peas and fetta got swiped by my sidekick, but on the whole it was super yum. I also met another mum with a 2-year-old called Felix, and we had a great chat about how your relationships change after you have kids, and how hard it is, and whether I should wean at 12 months or not. That's one of the things I love about this motherhood gig, that you have an instant connection to other first-time mums because you all have this OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL ARE WE DOING vibe. We are like scientists conducting a huge experiment with high stakes and we are all equally under-qualified for the job.

After lunch we went and visited Lee at a job he was finishing in Carlton. It is an apartment for a semi-famous architect, and I met him and chatted about the sense of space in art deco buildings and I surprised myself with how much I knew on the topic. Feeling all pro designer fancy business lady, and then Archie started trying to eat all the books on the bookshelf and I switched back into mum mode. Thanks darling.

5. Last night, Lee and I had a date to see Postsecret Live at Hamer Hall. I have sporadically read the Post Secret site over the years and always loved the concept. People send in anonymous handmade postcards to this guy Frank Warren's house with secrets on them. There are all sorts, from mundane stuff to really intense confessions. Anyway, last night we saw Frank speak about the 500,000+ secrets that have arrived at his house, and then the audience could come up and share their secrets. It got pretty heavy but I left feeling really connected to my fellow humans. We really are all in this together (thanks, Ben Lee).

First tooth.

So the Easter Bunny hooked up with the Tooth Fairy and brought Archie a tooth on Easter Sunday. It was relatively crisis-free, excluding a few crankypants moments on Saturday afternoon.

And now I live in fear of every feed. He has already mastered whacking me in the face with his bowl, pinching and twisting the skin on my neck, stomping on my tummy, headbutting me in the nose with his massive noggin and clawing my eyes out. Imagine putting your nipple in a piranha's mouth for ten minutes several times a day. CHOMP.

Wish me luck, peeps.

Five things for a Friday.

So apparently shoes belong in the mouth, not on the feet. Der Mum.

1. I had lunch with Tess yesterday at Miss Marmalade in Brunswick. It was yum! And there's a good little space out the back with toys and carpet and high chairs for babies to go wild and hang out together. Afterwards I drove past our new house (yay!) and we had a quick look at the little park at the end of the street. I cannot WAIT to move there. I know I keep going on about the location, but is 100 metres from Brunswick Library, the Brunswick Baths, the Retreat, two kinders, a maternal and child health centre, lots of friends houses,  stacks of cafes, Royal Park and trams. For someone who grew up within walking distance of NOTHING (except my best friend's house) and had to drive everywhere, this is very exciting.

2. We are chook and cat-sitting this weekend for a friend who lives around the corner. I'm preeeeeeetty excited about that. We had chooks when I was a kid and I definitely want to get them again one day. I think it's great for kids to grow up with as much messy, real, sustainable stuff as possible. I'm also dead-set on getting beehives too. And we were compensated with a stack of Swiss chocolate, so yay!

3. I'm reading two books from the library at the moment. One day I might actually read some fiction again, but for now it's still baby books. The first is called Buddhism for Mothers by Sarah Napthali, and it is actually really awesome. I wish I had read it when I was pregnant and could refer to it in the crazy early days after Archie was born when I was unravelling slightly. It's not woo-woo and too spiritual, but has basic, centred advice about dealing with the chaos of babies and kids and the struggle with selflessness and loving your baby so much you actually worry that you might eat him. (But those arms are so scrumptious!)

The other book is called Mothers Raising Sons by Nigel Latta. It's okay, so far. Lots of stuff about the differences and similarities between boys and girls. It's not that relevant now, but might become more important when I have a smelly, grunty teenage boy and no idea how to communicate with him.

4. Today is Good Friday, and NOTHING is open. Lee is working today and Monday, so Easter it is a bit of a non-event for us, although Archie might have his first taste of chocolate on Sunday, depending on how generous I'm feeling. Lee's sister, her partner and their foster son are staying tonight and I had grand plans of making a yummy Thai salad with satay dressing. YUM. But, all the supermarkets and shops are shut.  I totally didn't realise that everything actually shuts (first world problem). So I think we will be having some sort of pasta dish with minimal vegies as there is not much food in the house. GOOD ORGANISING, CLARK.

5. I went to yoga last night! There is a little fitness studio place across the road and I got a flyer last week advertising yoga classes on Thursday nights. It was so, so good to actually do some intentional movement that isn't just lugging around a massive wriggly baby or half-assed stretching. Feeling a bit achey today but it's good pain.

Five Things for a Friday.

 

1. This week has been a bit of a blah. Lots of time spent with a super-crankypants baby with no sign of teeth and lots of attitude. At one point I actually Googled "Baby mood swings normal" because he is such a lunatic. Frustrated, grizzly, spitting his food at me, and then he switches to being super cute and smiley and trying to kiss my face. It is like living with a hormonal teenage girl, but without inhibitions.

2. On Wednesday Archie and I went for a wander along High St Northcote. It was our old 'hood when we lived in our first house and I miss it. Such a good vibe. We had lunch at Two Short Men, which is just off the main drag. It's in a really good spot, and has excellent potential, but doesn't quite hit the mark. It's trying to be an cool hipster cafe but pulls up a bit short. The waitstaff were wearing gym clothes and runners and the menu was average. This restaurant reviewer was unimpressed.

3. I made some bread, like the domestic godess that I am these days. I had grand plans of making bread from scratch and adding my own seeds and everything, but I was at the supermarket getting the bread flour etc and saw this stuff - it's four individual packets of portioned bread flour with seeds, for $6. So I just got that. And it was DELICIOUS. I really need to start doing it more often. The house smelled amazing and it was super-yum.

4. Last weekend we went out for an afternoon jaunt to the Fairfield Boathouse and had a raspberry spider and brownie. There was another young family with a newish baby there, they were obviously first time parents as they were paparazzing the crap out of their bemused looking son (as were we, obviously.) We started chatting and all was well until they asked how old my daughter was. Awkward. Usually I'm not fussed about the odd bit of gender confusion but that day I was like, fo realz? HIS name is ARCHIE!

5. The auction for the house we want is tomorrow at 12pm. I am excited and nervous. There has been lots of interest so hopefully it doesn't go for megabucks and we are in with a chance. The next adventure begins!

Nine months (and two weeks)

I wrote this a couple of weeks ago when Archie hit the nine month mark, but forgot to publish it then. Dear Archer,

You are nine months old today. That means that you have been here for as long as you were growing inside my tummy. It has gone very fast, and sometimes I feel sad thinking about how you aren't a tiny scrunched-up little smelly-necked bean anymore. But then I look at your huge blue eyes and get excited about the little boy that you are becoming. Your dad and I are have finally gotten the hang of this whole parenting gig and have found our groove. We are growing up, you and I. I can confidently tell how you are feeling and I'm learning to slooooow down when you need it.

You have learned to wave, and high five, and are getting the hang of using a spoon. Last night you were crawling around aimlessly, then I came around a corner and you broke into a huge grin and came barrelling towards me. I laughed and waved and you stopped, steadied yourself on one arm, then flapped your right arm ferociously with a huge beaming smile. My heart melted.

We have been teaching you how to clap, and you clasp your hands together and shake them around proudly. You still haven't mastered the fact that you need to separate your hands to clap, but your cute victory clasp is getting lots of smiles and cheers from your dad and I.

Your are definitely making your opinions known to everyone now, and boy, do you have opinions. You do not like your sleeping bag, waiting more than three seconds in the high chair without food, avocado, crawling on long grass (prickly!), getting stuck in corners, and sitting still. You love eating whole nectarines, peaches and pears, using a spoon, waving and high fives, being outside, your nan and having a shower with your dad. You can demolish a ripe peach in seconds, but will happily play with a handful of disposable spoons and an empty ice-cube tray for 40 minutes.

The baby books tell me that about this age you might get a bit hesitant around strangers, and I can see it a little bit now. You bury your head and smile shyly when someone new talks to you. You climb all over me as soon as we sit on the floor, and prefer to just sit in my lap and smile than to stray too far. I do kind of love it though, because the little snuggles won't last forever once you are walking. I think it will be soon, as you are already cruising around, holding onto the couch and my legs.

I can see more of your dad in you every day. You are a little mini Lee, and I can see you as a toddler wanting to help him with everything. "And me, Dad?" We watched Lee mow the lawn the other day and I had to restrain you from crawling out across the lawn and 'helping'. Your eyes light up and you start flapping and shrieking with excitement when you hear your dad's car pull up in the evenings.

I love you, little man. May you grow up with a tough mind, and a warm heart. Work hard. Then a bit harder. Travel. Be a good boyfriend. Don't be afraid of your emotions. Live large and messily. Make mistakes. Be on time. And be confident that we will always have your back.

Love,

Mum

Five things for a Friday - Sister Wives and shoes

1. I have been meaning to get a photo book made of our gorgeous wedding photos, and have FINALLY gotten off my ass and started doing it. Our photographer Tricia King (oh, look at the gorgeous bride on her website!) is super amazeballs awesome and so far the book is just every single photo from the day as I am unable to edit a single one. It's an 800-page tome of awesome. And Snapfish (they are doing the photobook- there are lots of places which do them but they seem good. And they have 25% off during March!) One day I will get organised and do a proper post all about the wedding.

2. I have been watching this reality TV showcalled Sister Wives. Totes addicted. It's all about this fundy Mormon guy who has four wives and 16 kids. I LOVE to analyse other people's relationship so this is like porn for me. They are really upfront about the jealousy issues they have, and how they manage the day-to-day running of a massive family. I think I could totally cope with Lee having another wife or two. Mainly because I'd get the bed to myself every few nights to watch crap TV late and read and eat snacks.

3. Shoes! My old standard Jellies broke last week. I was pretty devastated but pretty excited that I had a justifiable reason to buy more shoes. So obviously, I replaced one pair of shoes with...two pairs. I got red Saltwater Sandals (from here - cheapest place online that I found) which are ridiculously comfy and cute, and another pair of Jellies in SILVER GLITTER. I'm totally living out my childhood again. The Salties turn my little toes numb, which is weird, but otherwise they are my new uniform shoes. And really, what is the point of the little toe anyway.

4. There has been lots of kitchen action this week. I made this tarte tatin to use up the millions of chezza tomatoes we have, this couscous thing which used up lots of leftover bits of rando stuff, these AMAZING caramel brownies, bog-standard broc pasta and two batches of nectarine crumble because we have a glut of nectarines. I'm still doing the 12WBT, but have moved away from the recipes as I was finding them too boring so am just freestyling and tracking the calories. I have actually reached my goal so am relaxing a bit and focussing on eating good, seasonal food. The weather finally cooled down yesterday, so I can crank the oven more often. I want to make these rolls and this bread.

5. Archie has been obsessed with getting into the kitchen cupboards and drawers. We've got a safety catch on the cupboard under the kitchen sink but everything else he is pretty okay to get into. Because I have been cooking lots lately (see above) the pantry is pretty much always open, and he got stuck into the cans and platters and beer bottles that  aren't exactly baby-freindly. So I moved all that stuff and put some random tupperware and paper plates and stuff in there for him to play with. He LOVES IT. It keeps him happily entertained while I get breakfast in the morning. Parenting WIN.